Forgiving But Not Forgetting

Forgiveness is rooted in love, which is the fruit of forgiveness. Forgiveness starts with love, and it results in love. God is of love, and He came to earth in the form of man (Jesus) not only to love all humans but also to ask all humans to love one another. 

^““Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Matthew 22: 37-39 

Instead of giving humans the punishment they deserve, Jesus Christ paid for all their sins and all their wrongs “as far as the east is from the west.” So, no matter what, forgiving self is crucial.

Forgiving Others     

Forgiving self is forgiving wrongs done to others, while forgiving others is forgiving wrongs done to self. Maybe the former is easier than the latter.

As an illustration of forging others, on September 24, 2016, runner and cyclist Dean Otto was struck by a car driven by Will Huffman, a 27-year-old salesman, with his buddy on their way to a football game. The crash left Dean Otto paralyzed.

After assessing Otto’s condition, Dr. Matt McGirt told the Otto family that Dean Otto was 99 percent likely going to spend the rest of his days in a wheelchair. It was sad and scary news for the Otto family.

But Otto was never scared—or even resentful. Instead, he said a private prayer and instantly forgave Will Huffman. Otto said: “I knew if I didn’t, the resentment would eat me alive.”

After the surgery on his spine performed by Dr. Matt McGirt, Otto began his miraculous recovery. As a matter of fact, a few hours after the surgery, Otto was able to wiggle his toes.

Through Facebook, Will Huffman and his wife were finally able to contact Otto’s family, who welcomed them graciously with open arms.

Huffman was not surprised that Otto would forgive him, but he didn’t expect or imagine that they would become good friends afterwards. Huffman even said: “I think most people would stop there and say, ‘Nice meeting you, but I’m done.’”

Dr. Matt McGirt was also inspired by their close friendship, and he earnestly believed that it was Otto’s attitude, forgiveness, and loving-kindness that had brought about his phenomenal recovery. The doctor also remarked: “He not only turned lemons into lemonade, but he’s selling that lemonade, too.” Otto raised $11,000 for Carolinas Rehabilitation’s LIFE Program for spinal cord injury patients.

On July 22, 2017, Otto, Huffman, and Dr. McGirt reunited and they all participated in a half-marathon race. The event was widely reported in the media all over the United States.

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13

Not Forgetting

Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting or excusing the harm done to the victim.

Not forgetting the harm done can free the victim from any further and future control of the victimizer. Not forgetting means continual praying for forgiveness that might even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy, and compassion for the victimizer.

Not forgetting the circumstances may help the victim learn valuable lessons from them to avoid any future wrongdoing.

Not forgetting helps remembering healing rather than hurting. More importantly, God gives humans what they need, and not what they deserve.

The Bottom Line

Throughout your life on earth, had you done many wrongs to others to get what you wanted? Had you ever forgiven yourself for your wrongdoings? How had you responded to the vengeance from your victims—remorse and repentance, or an eye for an eye?

Had you forgiven others in your past? Or you had been carrying your bag and baggage of hatred, injustice, and vengeance?

Living by faith: God is a forgiving God. So, forgive yourself first and then others, but never forget the past--your "reminder" of God's forgiveness. 

Stephen Lau 

Living By Faith Is Living In Miracles